Wednesday, September 30, 2009

hey ! Roman was it worth it ?

Samantha Geimer, the 13 yo Roman Polanski admitted to having drugged, raped and sodomized in 1977, today at  age45.

"Polanski was arrested Saturday in Zurich. The U.S. has been seeking his extradition for having sex with a 13-year-old girl in 1977." Tate said: "He was evaluated not to be a paedophile and there's rape and then there's rape. It was determined that Roman did not forcibly have sex with this young (13 yo child) "woman"..."

NO, he used champange and a qualude...... no "force" at all, very CONSENSUAL.

But if reference to Susan Atkins, very little kindness.

"Debra Tate, sister to the slain actress, commented, "Keeping the murderers in prison is the least we, as a society who values justice, can do."

Wonder if they'll put Polanski in with Phil Spector ?  Any takers on some action on who's going to be the pitcher or the catcher? Normally, I'd give 3 to 1 on Spector being the 'bottom', but pedophiles are such true pieces of human offal and extremely weak (which is why they exploit children and not adults) so even if Spector is a little fairy, I'll go 2-1 Spector-pitching and Polanski-catching....

Monday, September 28, 2009

T & A

Well my caustic wit and stupid cigar reviews don't seem to be garnering the attention I crave, SOOOOO....

Man, I really get a charge out of this cigar advertisement. Although, I wonder what this "sexy model" would really look like without all the mascara and makeup. Plus, I doubt she would actually know what to do with the cigar.

Anyway, I'll have to pay attention next time I'm smoking a dog rocket to see if I'm seriously deluded enough to think that cigar puffing is some kind of babe magnet. Or whether I am merely suffering some type of dementia and an infantile oral fixation.......or something.

Thursday, September 24, 2009


Let's see the Government has saved and redeemed the millions of little boys and girls raped and molested by Priests, so now it's time to move onto the next scourge that's plauging the youngsters these days: FLAVORED CIGARETES.

"These flavored cigarettes are a gateway for many children and young adults to become regular smokers," FDA Commissioner Margaret Hamburg said Tuesday in a statement."

Yes, we must save the children. But, is there any evidence that this strategy will work ? Will the little tykes just start firing up Camels instead ?

First off, I don't smoke any of the horrid chemically laden cardboard crap anyway. But, then I don't drink Budweiser Beer or wine, and for the same reason. But is it my business that people actually buy and maybe read PLAYBOY or HUSTLER magazine ? Real women aren't that ugly and plastic...

"Smoking is the leading preventable cause of death in this country, killing about 443,000 people a year, including 49,000 from secondhand exposure, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention."

Really, now. And of those 443,000 preventable deaths; alcohol, donuts and fried food wasn't a factor ? Water and Air pollution wasn't a factor ? (It is.)  And, 49,000 were killed off by second hand smoke, that's more people than killed by drunken drivers and handguns combined. So why aren't cigarettes illegal ? Why is Alcohol illegal ? Why aren't cars banned ? In fact, TV's and video games are going to kill more of those little fatties sitting around doing nothing for a 100 hours a week, not moving, not thinking.

What's the real deal ? Follow the MONEY ! "It's all about the economy, STUPID !"

"The three biggest U.S. tobacco companies say they do not produce any flavored cigarettes other than menthol varieties."


Monday, September 21, 2009

TCC Dog Rocket Roundup.....or, in search of a cheap cigar that doesn't bite you on the arse....

I'm not sure how I ended up with such a collection of the Thompson Cigar  house brands, but it did happen.

Now, I can say with a straight face that these are actually passable even if they are at the very low end of the 'premium' scale. Provided you take in to account that we are also including those mass produced packaged things sold in convience stores everywhere for comparison purposes.

Com'on all the big cigar outfits sell bundles of their 'house brands', and the sales pitch either varies from "something fell off the truck one night", to "we have 'seconds' of the high priced brand', to "why be a smuck and pay the long price when you can get a cheap smoke that sort of tastes like ______."  So to make it easy for you, I'll list them according to their ranking on the DOG ROCKET METER (TM) which goes from -1 to 2.

SOCORRO  this is a -1, nobody ever says anything good about these, except they might be on a par with Swisher Sweets. Can anybody be that desperate for a smoke ?

1898 another -1. The dead looking multicolor tobacco in these means they are made with crap leaf.

DON LUGO, another -1, bow wow  !  bow wow !

Dona Innes, Miraflor, Corojo Cubano, and Cordova. Big fat ZEROES. May do in a pinch, BUT !!!!!!!

Now we get to the ones that are worth smoking; whether there are better deals for the same money out there is another issue altogether. However, these earn the dubious distinction of rating a 1. Yes, an awesome one thumb up, in that you aren't getting ripped off if you buy some of these. Hopefully,  at distressed prices from a "friend" who's turning his nose up at them because they aren't getting puff pieces about them in CIGAR FOOL,  MODERN SMOKER, or HIP SUCKER.

Havana Nights (there goes the if it has "havana" in the name don't waste your money advice).
TCC Uniques- green label

So their you go, you could have wasted up to $350 finding out those duds, which you can now on some smokeable and less offensive dog rockets....

Monday, September 14, 2009

Corojo Cubano

Goodness, this is the last in collection of 'dog rockets of death'. A big batch of house brand robustos I have. Now I have to admit that this was another 'tastes like tobacco' cigar, although it's still going for over $2 a stick in bundles, while many many other no names and house brands are being closed out, sometimes for 99c.

Well, it started coming unraveled as soon as I trimed the cap. But, in all fairness, a good licking and the wrapper held till I smoked it to the end. (that is I read that in the old days some people would actually stick cigars in their mouth "to taste them" and give them a good slime job- while no admits to it or are their any written recollections the consensus was it was done to keep the far from perfect cigars of that time from falling apart...).

The big line up is next, and then the reviews will start all over again. same old same old.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

a night in a dog's ass......

This is a combo filler item from the Dominican Republic, ground zero for the cigar industry. And I imagine they call these smokes "a night in havana" trying to pawn these off as a 'cuban sandwich'.  But, I have to admit that this was the very first TCC house brand that cutting the head off wasn't an exertion. It just seemed that these were a cut above the daily dog rockets. Tasted fine. So I guess that puts it at 'zero' on "the dogrocket scale of delight" TM right at the serviceable and acceptable. In case you forget the scale goes from -1 to 2 !!! Of course, a 1 being a must have and a 2 being reserved for some brand I'll never be able to afford to smoke....

Tuesday, September 8, 2009


Well, it seems TCC has a black label and a red label house brand, but for some reason their green label is called 'uniques'. Perhaps because the red and black bands are dirt dirt cheapos. Anyway, I fired one of these up while the dogs were running around the bog today.  This puppy started off with that earth tone that suggests dubious parentage, but then all I remember after that was looking at that tiny little leftover stub before I launched it into the drink. So it did grow on me and I'm looking forward to trying that one again.
I can't say that about some of the other Thompson House Brands, but then this one books in at well over $2 each in a bundle. Perhaps that might be a dead giveaway !!! Anyway, just one more to try: "a night in havana". Really, what a name to call a dog rocket. So after that, they'll be a big recap. That's about 2 out of 7 that I would even consider paying money for again, and a good 5 duds. Of course, a lot of that ought to be blamed on individual preference, but then again it should be interesting to get up a round one scorecard and see what transpires as I empty out the 'guest' humidor slowly over the coming winter.

Sunday, September 6, 2009

CORDOVA: is it a car or a is it a dog rocket ?

Okay, technically that was a Chrysler Cordoba... the car that is.

And if anybody can remember back that far, that was hawked by Ricardo Montalbán (aka Kahn) and "it's ze plane, boss, it's ze plane..."

Really ? this is suppose to be an "economy" version of a macanudo put out by Augusto Reyes...... And you might wonder what it tastes like ? You might not get the reference, but think "genuine synthetic Corinthian leather.." and you get the idea.

Of course, it's just a dog rocket, so in that respect it's serviceable, but think along the lines of 'earth tone' and someting like aroma of burnt charcoal...

cigar sizes reference

like real boring, i know...but !

* Almuerzos (5 1/8 x 50)
* Britanicas (5 3/8 x 46)
* Cadetes (4 1/2 x 36)
* Campanas (5 1/2 x 52)
* Carlotas (5 5/8 x 35)
* Carolinas (4 3/4 x 26)
* Cazadores (6 3/8 x 44)
* Cervantes (6 1/2 x 42)
* Coronas (5 1/2 x 42)
* Coronas Gordas (5 5/8 x 46)
* Coronas Grandes (6 1/8 x 42)
* Cosacos (5 3/8 x 42)
* Dalias (6 3/4 x 43)
* Delicados (7 1/2 x 38)
* Delicados Extra (7 1/4 x 36)
* Entreactos (4 x 30)
* Especiales (5 1/4 x 45)
* Exquisitos (5 3/4 x 46)
* Favoritos (4 3/4 x 41)
* Franciscanos (4 1/2 x 40)
* Franciscos (5 5/8 x 44)
* Generosos (5 1/4 x 41)
* Gran Corona (9 1/4 x 47)
* Hermosos No. 4 (5 x 48)
* Julieta 2 (7 x 47)
* Londres (5 x 40)
* Marevas (5 x 42)
* Minutos (4 3/8 x 42)
* Ninfas (7 x 33)
* Numero 1 (7 1/2 x 38)
* Numero 2 (6 x 38)
* Numero 3 (4 1/2 x 26)
* Palmas (6 3/4 x 33)
* Palmitas (6 x 32)
* Panetelas (4 5/8 x 34)
* Panetelas Largas (6 7/8 x 28)
* Parejos (6 1/2 x 38)
* Perlas (4 x 40)
* Petit Bouquets (4 x 42)
* Piramides (6 1/8 x 52)
* Placeras (4 7/8 x 34)
* Prominentes (7 5/8 x 49)
* Robustos (4 7/8 x 50)
* Seoane (4 7/8 x 36)
* Superiores (5 3/4 x 40)
* Tacos (6 1/4 x 47)
* Trabucos (4 3/8 x 38)